Being a Five-Year-Old on Valentine’s Day

“Valentine’s Day is my favorite,” said my five-year-old student in the middle of a discussion about seasons.

I tried to tell her that it wasn’t a season. Also, what made her so quick to choose THAT holiday? But she was very adamant about her answer. “Valentine’s Day!” she kept saying.

Too often, this day of love is over commercialized (like many holidays). It teaches us to look for the perfect gift, the most romantic getaways and the most eye-catching celebrity matches. And quite frankly, the media makes love look really stressful and messed-up.

But for kids, that’s not what Valentine’s Day is about. Their idea of a day devoted to love is all about walking around with confidence, being a good friend and learning healthy ways to show love.

Though there are merits to using Valentine’s Day to go out with that special someone or eat a whole box of chocolates, I think there are some things we can learn from celebrating the day of love through the eyes of a five-year-old.

1. Valentine’s Day isn’t just about not being single.

I know Valentine’s Day plus being single sounds like a contradiction, but I don’t think the holiday is so much about being in love as being confident in your own shoes. Let me explain what I mean.

Kids don’t have anyone to impress, but that doesn’t stop them from dressing their best — preferably with red clothes and heart headbands. Kids don’t care about what other people think. So rather than shrinking into the background on Valentine’s Day, they want to shine!

For young kids Valentine’s Day is about confidence. It’s about being your best self, for you. And everyone, no matter their relationship status, can do that.

2. It is a time to reassess your connections during the coldest season.

So maybe you have got the confidence part down, but winter is still a really difficult time of year. Whether you are a senior citizen trying to get out of your snowy driveway, one of the only kids left at school during a basketball game, or a stay-at-home mom just looking for a friend, winter can make you lonely.

Valentine’s Day allows us to reassess the people who really matter to us. If you are feeling lonely, why not reach out to an old friend or call a family member? You could take advantage of the after-holiday chocolate sales and buy a treat for one of them. Or you could write a nice valentine for someone you look up to. (Just make a valentine; all the five-year-olds are doing it!)

There are many more connections to build up than just the romantic ones. Valentine’s Day gives us a good chance to do it.

3. It is about learning to build healthy relationships.

According to youth.gov healthy relationships include, among other things, mutual respect, trust, honesty, compromise, individuality, good communication, problem solving, and self-confidence.

On Valentine’s Day kids walk around and throw valentines at everyone they meet. It teaches them healthy ways to show care for other people. Learning to respect, trust, and problem solve with those you care about is really the central point of love.

That’s what Valentine’s Day should be teaching.

So it’s no wonder this little five-year-old loved Valentine’s Day so much. It was because for her, the day was about walking around with confidence, being a good friend and learning healthy ways to show love. And I wish her many more five-year-old Valentine’s Days to come.

– by Abbie Call

Feature image caption: Valentine’s Day is a time to not be ashamed of being single, reassess our connections, and learn to build healthy relationships … like a 5-year-old would do. Courtesy Jill Wellington.

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